Sunday, January 30, 2005

In kuwait.

Having a good time, wanna talk a lot about it, but the buses are gonna be here any minute and we're going SHOPPING, lol

Will write everything on paper, and once I'm back, I'll have plenty of time to talk abt it.

Miss ya all...

Posted by Noors at 4:51 PM 0 comments

Friday, January 28, 2005

I'm leaving in a few hours.

Almost done with packing, now spending some time online before I go and change.

Called the people I know and said goodbye to everyone.

I do hope I have fun there.....

Will try and post something from there.

Take care everyone.

Posted by Noors at 1:00 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Big surprise!!

i'm sitting in my friends office right now, and you won't guess what happened to me. My doc won't take a no for an answer. He called me this morning, and tells me that he has my ticket, now I was sleeping when he called, but after he said that, I was wide awake and the adrenaline was rushing through my body. I could've believe what I just heard, and I told him that I didn't want to go.

So I come to college, to finish a few things and to try and talk to him again. I said I'm gonna tell him exactly why I didnt' want to go. We kept talking for more than half an hour, yet he still wouldn't take no for an answer. He just kept telling me that this was my oppertunity, and that he wants me, of all students, to be there, lol, he even said that I can sit next to him on the plane if it would make me feel better. Anyway, he was so sweet that I just couldn't argue any further, plus he wouldn't take a no for an answer anyway. So my big surprise is, I'M GOING TO KUWAIT! Sam is so gonna kill me, so will Tia, but you guys, I leave on Friday, and I'll be back on Tuesday, so I won't be gone for that long.

(back home now btw)

Now, I need to buy a few things to wear, it's cold over there and I've got nothing that's thick enough to keep me warm....

Life does work in it's weirdest ways doesn't it? I mean, I went to bed last night making plans for next week, I even wrote about my basic life support here, I never knew I'd wake up the next morning with this phone call. I hope I don't regret agreeing on it though, ahh, will see..

Posted by Noors at 1:52 PM 0 comments

Monday, January 24, 2005

I'm in a weird mood. I've been so nice to everyone today. I offered to take the kids out to the beach, because the weather was amazing, and then took them to costa to get a bite to eat. I didn't argue with my mom when she told me to go pick up my sister and cousins from pizza hut this afternoon, nor did I argue abt picking up the kids from the park at night.

Honestly, I'm feeling kinda down, that's why I've been covering it up with the smiles. You know everyone feels sorry for me for what happened, and I hate it, lol. I hate it when ppl feel sorry for me and tell me that what happened to me was unfair, I never like being in the weak spot, and I never let these little issues bother me, and if they do, then I prefer not talking abt it and moving on, it's not worth it anyway. Life is too short to worry abt materialistic matters. I hate the competitive atmosphere in my college. Everyone's biggest aim is to be number one, regardless of the others, well not all, so I'm not gonna generalize. To them, if you're not in the top, then your'e nothing. To them, it's your marks that determine how good you are, feelings come last to a lot of em'. Oh don't you go thinking now that I'm flunking in college! I'm doing very well, I'm just talking how lame ppl can be, and how they look at things from such a narrow angle.

I'm starting a basic life support workshop next week. Now this should be very exciting, I really hope they've planned it well because I'll seriously be very disappointed if it turns out to be a big failure. I'm so looking forward to learning how to intubate, and how to perform a tracheostomy. Just to explain those medical words, to intubate, means to stick a tube down a patients throat to help him or her breath, and a tracheostomy, is when you make a hole right beneath the adam's apple, and put a tube again to help a patient breath, if there's any kind of obstruction that makes it impossible for you to intubate. I think I'll learn the first but not the second, I think it's a bit complicated for our level, but hey I can always ask, can't I?!!

Posted by Noors at 10:06 PM 0 comments

Sunday, January 23, 2005

Evergreen

Here are the lyrics of a song by westlife called 'evergreen'. I'm just crazy abt these simple yet touching words.

"Eyes
Like a sunrise
Like a rainfall
Down my soul
And I wonder
I wonder why you look at me like that
What you're thinking
What's behind
Don't tell me
But it feels like love
I'm gonna take this moment
And make it last forever
I'm gonna give my heart away
And pray we'll stay together
Cause you're the one good reason
You're the only girl that I need
Cause you're more beautiful than I have ever seen
I'm gonna take this night
And make it Evergreen
Touch
Like a angel
Like velvet to my skin
And I wonder
Wonder why you wanna stay the night
What you're dreaming
What's behind
Don't tell me
But it feels like love
I'm gonna take this moment
And make it last forever
I'm gonna give my heart away
And pray we'll stay together
Cause you're the one good reason
You're the only girl that I need
Cause you're more beautiful than I have ever seen
I'm gonna take this night
And make it Evergreen
(Don't tell me
But it feels like love)
I'm gonna take this moment
And make it last forever
I'm gonna give my heart away
And pray we'll stay together
Cause you're the one good reason
You're the only girl that I need
Cause you're more beautiful than I have ever seen
I'm gonna take this night
And make it Evergreen"

Posted by Noors at 11:10 AM 0 comments

Saturday, January 22, 2005

The farm

Like I said, after spending one night all alone and having the luxury of silence, I drove yesterday afternoon to the farm. It's really cool to drive your own car all the way there, you're just free to leave whenever you want to and you don't feel like you're tied to someone else.

My cousins bought a quadbike, or whatever, it's a motor bike with 4 wheels. We took turn riding on it around the farm, that was neat. lol I sucked the first time I tried it, hehe, my cousin kept thinking that I'd bump into a wall and kill the two of us!

We had a BBQ last night too, it's one of our customs during eid. We always have one on the second day of eid at night, while we're all sitting outside. We have a couple of swings too, indian type, that we call 'pingo', lol weird name I know.

Oh and everyone thought I was talking to my bf everytime my phone rang. Someone would just come and sit next to me and try to figure out whether I was talking to a guy or a girl, lol, and it was Sam each and everytime, lol.

Posted by Noors at 7:42 PM 0 comments

Kuwait

So this afternoon I was so convinced that I'm definitly NOT going to Kuwait. My aunt said I shouldn't go, because I don't have my presentation anymore, and I need to prove that I'm not dying to go to this stupid conference.

My parents want me to go to have a good time and see a new place and spend some time with my relatives over there. My dad also said that I can always benifit from the presentations given over there and from the workshop.

What's holding me back? Well the fact that I'm not going to present anymore, so it would mean that I'm going there for absolutely no reason whatsoever. I've seen what's it like to go there when you're not doing anything, and I remember thinking that I never wanted to be there if I was going to be useless, and if I had nothing to offer.
Then there are the girls. Seriously, I'm closer to the guys than the girls. After being with them for 5 years, they still consider me to be different, I mean, yeah, they're nice to me, well most of the times anyway, but I'm not so sure whether I'm gonna be comfy there with them, you know, day and night, I'll probably be hanging out with the guys most of the time.
My aunt says that I need to learn to stand up when things like these happen. Like this time, I don't get to present, why? Because I won last year, now how much sense to you get out of that? They should've told me from the beginning.
Oh and of course, the idea of me being sick on the plane just gives me the shivers. I can take my meds, but I'll still be drowsy and extremely tired. Do I want my colleagues to see me in that pathetic way? Oh God, NO!

I do know that it could be fun. A lot of the guys, and I stress again, guys, I know are going. People whom I enjoy their company, but a lot of things are holding me back. Sometimes I just think that I'd rather stay here, in my house, and spend some quality time for myself, relaxing, chillin', and giving myself a rest from the world and especially from SQU, and everything that relates to it. I need it so badly, I just want to stay away from all of this, and just concentrate on myself.


Posted by Noors at 7:16 PM 0 comments

Friday, January 21, 2005

Eid Mubarak everyone.

I'm enjoying the peace of and luxury of silence, lol. My dad is in Haj, and last time I talked to him, he seems to be enjoying every minute of it, may Allah accept his Haj, Amen.

My mom and the kids have all gone to the farm with the rest of the family. I've decided to stay home for an extra day, so here I am. I spent the night watching tv, smallvile, gilmore girls, and a movie called return to me. I love this movie, it's a romantic comedy with David Duchovony, he's one of my favourites, which a lot of us know as Agent Fox Mulder from the X files. The movie talks abt this guy who's wife dies, and her heart being given to a young lady who was dying with heart disease. He later somehow, I call it fate, meets up with this lady and falls for her, without knowing that she has his late wife's heart. It's a touching story that holds a lot of feelings, I started tearing at the end of it!

Now this morning, I woke up with the plan of going to watch the incredibles in the movies. I was gonna go all by myself, pathetic I know, lol, but I'm dying to watch it. So Sam says I shouldn't and that it's weird for me to go alone here in Oman. Now I'm counting on her to go with me tomorrow, it's an excuse to leave the farm early.

I should be leaving in two hours. I'll spend the night at the farm with the family, and tomorrow we'll have some more people coming in for the shiwa. And maybe now I'll have a chance to finish this book that a friend gave to me which is called Good Omen. I've tried to finish it, but for the last few weeks, the only chance I had to read was either between the hopsital and sessions, or late at night, so go figure.

Plus, I finally have the time to sit down and think abt my own group fitness class. It's no piece of cake, I can tell you. I don't even know where to start.

Anyways, later, I still haven't packed, so I need to get that out of the way and then enjoy what's left of my peaceful hours!

Posted by Noors at 2:10 PM 1 comments

Sunday, January 16, 2005

How low can people go for the sake of money? Does money give you an excuse to go across the limits and forget all about morality and integrity?

There are people unfortunatlly out there, who think of nothing but money, who's lives rotate around collecting as much as they can, regardless of how they do it. They would use the cheapest, lowest, most sneaky ways to achieve their goals, and this just makes me sick. What is the world coming to anyway? You try to work peacefully, but there are sick people out there who can't stand to see someone else succeed, so they throw all the rocks they can get and throw them in your face, just to make you trip and fall.

I just don't understand how these people can sleep at night, knowing that they've caused harm to someone innocent? Whatever happened to their inner spirits? Gone with the wind? Burried beneath the ground? Is it all of a sudden okay to go around messing up with people's lives just because they won't listen to you or won't do what you ask them to do or because they are no longer working for you and are doing far better without you?

When will poeple learn that material things don't last. It's your good deed in this world that matters, it's your good intentions to people and being honest with yourself and others around you that matters. They will probably, sooner or later, it always happens after a big fall, most people learn the hard way, and it's sad to know that they had the choice to choose the right thing to do, yet they chose the complete opposite and took the easy way out.

Posted by Noors at 8:53 PM 0 comments

Thursday, January 13, 2005

So today I get this urge to light all the candles that I have in my room. I start my lighting one that Sam got me as a birthday gift, and I left it in my bathroom so it can get filled with the lavender smell. I leave my room for 5 minutes, and next thing I know, I hear something cracking, believe it or not, it was the mirror in the bathroom, the sides were on fire:S I never knew it was made of plastic, I thought it was made of glass, just like the mirror. lol So much for my romantic crazy ideas. I guess it's the whole exams, panic are the reason behind my weird moods.

My mom really wants me to go to Kuwait. She keeps telling me that all the time, and she wouldn't take no for an answer. I just don't see the whole point of me going there. I mean yeah, it's gonna be fun hanging out with everyone over there, and my aunt who's living there said she's got this whole program ready for me, but I don't see the need for me to go when I get to do nothing. I'm not giving my presentation anymore, so I might as well just stay here, take as many classes as I want, hang out with my friends here, and just relaaaaaaaaax. I would love to just spend some time alone though, somewhere quite, where everything is green. Sit under the tree or on a swing and read. Damn that's too good to be true.

Body pump update (this is for myself, would be cool to come back months later and read this, it'll just remind me of how good it felt at this time) lunges, I was able to go fast by the end of the track, it was cool that I was able to do the whole thing. See in in this track, you start with stretching, then with weights, then you put your weights down and challange your legs and do some quick lunges, now most people go a bit slow, so the instructor goes in a moderate speed so everyone would follow, and one person who usually goes fast does that, and she would ask whoever wants to go fast too to just follow that one person. For the last couple of classes, it's been me! It felt good to be able to go fast, it was a good challange and I did it.
Oh and if my shoulder doesn't give me a hard time on Saturday, and if I finish a good deal of reading, then I'm using the yellow bar for the back track, I'm all set for my new challange!

It's one of the few things that really make my day nowadays, with everything that is. After a long stressful day at uni, and taking in all the crap from everywhere, that's my way of keeping 'me' alive.

Posted by Noors at 8:28 PM 1 comments

Saturday, January 08, 2005

Okay, I don't care what you guys think, BUT, it was great having things back.

Body Pump today was amazing. There were only three of us though, cause the others came in for the previous class, and were extremly tired to stay for another.

You can tell the difference instantly. You have to smile, otherwise M would give you one of her weird looks, lol, and she would keep staring at you, till you finally smile. The music, the weights, the sweating, the singing, etc... I can just go on and on!

I feel better from the inside. I feel like I can do anything now, it's like I got my lost strength back. It's my own way of keeping myself alive, for keeping my energy high.

it's my natural 'high'!

Now I feel more confidanct about my finals, I have something to look forward to after a long day at the hospital and the college.

A lot find it silly, and honestly, I don't care. It's one of the few things in my life that make me feel happy from the inside out, and I'm keeping it.

Posted by Noors at 7:18 PM 2 comments

Friday, January 07, 2005

Sometimes I wonder if there's anything special abt me. I always catch something about all the people I meet and think that they're special because of that one quality. Like Sam, I love the way she just talks about her beliefs and opinions and knows exactly how prove a point. Tia, the way she things and writes in her blogs, and the poems she writes, and her way of thinking in general always impresses me. There's this guy that I know who is incredibly intellectual. I listen to his ideas, and to the way he talks, and the way he thinks in particular, and I tell myself, now this is a mind that is not wasted.

My sister has a very unique personality. She's the cheerful kind of person, whom you'd never get bored with her being around. You can always tell the difference when she's not there, you just feel like there's something missing, and once she shows up, the atmosphere completely changes and you see everyone talking and laughing.

You see those with talents. People who draw, or sing, or play an instrument. Those who write poetry or take beautiful pictures.

Or the instructor at the gym. She has this irresistable personality, that makes you like her no matter what. You just can not dislike her ever. She just knows how to make you feel better and no matter how upset you are, you'll eventually start laughing and smiling.

I just wonder what makes me 'me'? You know? When others look at me, or remember me, what is the first thing that comes into their heads? A naive girl? A nice person? Or just another girl they know?

I wonder!

Posted by Noors at 11:32 PM 8 comments

Thursday, January 06, 2005

I'll miss ya sis!

My sister is leaving tonight. She's going back to Cardiff. These past few days have gone by so fast, and we've all enjoyed each others company, especially that all the famiy was here in Muscat. My aunt and her family as well as my other cousin all came back for the holiday from the States. They're all leaving now, one after the other, and I know I'm gonna miss them all terribly, because we had a wonderful time these last 3 weeks.

Anyway, this is for my sister. Take care of youself, and I guess we'll be seeing each other online now, and we'll talk to each other daily. I'm gonna miss ya loads, and I'm sorry I was too busy with my studies and never ending finals, that we couldn't do more stuff together, but I'm still glad we got to hang out together a few times.

Oh and Sam, thanks for fixing my blog, it looks neat, good job girl!

Posted by Noors at 4:27 PM 0 comments

YES!

Okay sam thinks I'm weird, and I think so too, but anyway, lol, I'm hyper, and excited because I went to the gym today to get myself a copy of the schedule, since my aunt too mine, and I saw my trainer there. I haven't seen her in 5 weeks, so we had a lovely chat.

I've missed her classes during the past month, it finally feels like things are gonna go back to normal starting next week, and I'll be able to get all my energy out there, lol, instead of being hyper and weird!

Haha, she said she can help me organize my own class, because the girls at uni want me to start giving them classes so they can get some exercise too. This should be awesome. In 12 days, I'll be free, and I'll have more time to focus on it. I hope I don't end up going to Kuwait, I just dont' see the whole point of it anyway, why go when I have nothing to do anyway? I can stay here and work on this instead, at least I'll be doing something!

Anyway, gotta go update the template so later!

Posted by Noors at 1:37 PM 3 comments

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Love?!!

You listen to all these wonderful romantic songs and read a lot of romantic poems, with beautiful words that describe love as the ultimate feeling a human being can ever feel. They somehow give you the impression that love is always magical, and you start to wonder what it feels like to be 'in love'.

But we all know that love isn't always a source of happiness, in fact, it's the source of worry and pain to a lot of it's victims, is that a good word to describe people? I don't really know whether to think of it as a blessing or a curse.

What about locking your heart and keeping it safe from love? Would you consider it as a sign of weakness? Personally, the idea of love itself, means that you need to give in with somethings, and your life would be greatly affected depending on that other person. You become more fragile.

Hmm, I think I've said this before. I was just wondering because I was reading the lyrics or a song, and they were amazing, it just made me wonder that someone actually wrote them. Did they feel it? Do they have these strong emotions and feelings towards someone that they were able to interpret their love beautifully into words? If so, then this kind of powerful and honest love does really exist, and by that, this proves that you do find it in real life and not just in movies or books? Or is it that this person is lacking that kind of love, and had all these feelings and the best way to let them out is by writing them down. Interesting, lol, I just thought of this btw.

Posted by Noors at 7:28 PM 3 comments

Yesssssss. Spent the day in the health centre's lab. I got to try many things. I pricked my friend and checked her blood sugar and hemoglobin, plus those of patients. I did a pregnancy test for a lady, but it came out to be negative, and finally, which is kinda gross, urine microscopy.

I actually felt like I was doing something! lol It was a lot of fun.

Hopefully on Saturday, I'll get the chance to give an injection to anyone. Can't wait!


Posted by Noors at 7:28 PM 1 comments

Monday, January 03, 2005

Switch off my brain!

Don't you wish sometimes that you can just 'switch off' your brain? I can't recall having a moment of rest for a few days now. There's a lot to do and there's a lot that's going on in my head. It seems like all my thoughts are fighting hard, trying individually to dominate whatever space there is in my brain. I would give anything to get a few peaceful hours of sleep. I would give anything to give my aching brain a few moments of absolute quite. I wonder what it feels like though, you know, thinking of absolutely nothing, to free your brain from the stress of thinking. And do you think it's healthy? Thinking is the brains exercise that keeps it active and sharp, but think about this for a sec. When you over do with your work out, your muscles eventually get fatigued and you develop cramps and it starts to hurt like hell, well then could it be that over thinkingwould fatigue the brain? Duh! But my question is, d you relax your brain? personally, exercise seems to be the only thing that works for me, it just releases everything out of my body in the form of heat, and I get swept into this completely other world, at least for an hour or so. Maybe this can explain why I'm not feeling myself lately. No exericse, an awful lot of work load, plus my usual self torture with my own self destroying thoughts and memories. Funny, how they only jump into my head when I'm least expecting them, or should I say when I least need them.

Okay, now that I got this all out of my system, here's something cheerful.

A girl I know asked me to get her my school's year book (96), I was in grade 8 at that time, God this sounds like ages ago. So I start going through the pics and I realized how much I miss my school days, and the people I've spent these wonderful years with. Now the girls all start giggling and laughing over my picture, lol, they said I looked like a nerd, hehe, well hey I think I looked cute!

Plus I talked to a friend whom I haven't seen in a long time. Was a nice chat friend!

Okay now the library is waiting for me, lol, gotta run!

Posted by Noors at 4:48 PM 0 comments

Saturday, January 01, 2005

First day of the new year!

For those of you who keep nagging cause I never put titles, lol I think I've just made your day.

What can I possibly say about this day. I was actually looking forward to today, I just imagined that since its' the first day of the new year things are gonna be great. Well, apparently, life ain't that generous, lol. It was just one of those days when NOTHING goes right. First, in the morning, I was almost late for my physiotherapy session because I couldn't find my hospital ID. I must admit that the physiotherapy was a lot of fun. One of the staff, was talking about acupuncture, and actually got a bunch of needles and inserted them into our hands, all of us. God I can still feel the pain of the current, it was a weird sensation, but you really do feel the power of it. She promised to teach me how to do it, she said to come back next month where they have sessions and practicals, so that's one thing to look forward to.

My presentation was fine, except that I had the coordinator of the rotation to supervise, and I didn't know that until today. She keeps digging on each and every sentence, God, I felt like my brain was about to explode, she wouldn't give you a chance to finish and she just jumps on you! Anyway I survived.

Oh and on top of everything, I broke my phone's screem. It fell from my hand with a bang into the floor. Just got it fixed and spent 27 rials on it, pfff, and I'm supposed to be saving money for my work out classes.

Then of course, there are my finals in two weeks, the pile of work on top of my head, and my relatives giving me a hard time because of the never ending invitations, and no one seems to understand.

Anyway, gotta run and study.

Posted by Noors at 9:15 AM 0 comments